Jadeismusic's Blog

rooting for the underdog

jadeismusic — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 23:26:19 +0000

partial to disaster i should laugh at you

but i dont cause i want to save you

ive already tied my hands with your bestest

my bad

she shouldnt treat you that way

but you cant say no one didnt tell you so

upside of anger is i know youll come back with a vengeance

i cant wait

<3

jadeismusic — Fri, 01 May 2009 00:28:43 +0000

id like to separate myself into two

id like my left half to fear nothing

id like my right half to work constantly

id like them to meet on tuesdays for a collective understanding as to who i am

my left half will fall in love the way it wants to

my right half will hold my heart down

my right will understand right from wrong

my left will take any chance it must

my right will fear for the left

and my left will love my right for it

dont even read this, seriously not worth it

jadeismusic — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 07:07:29 +0000

i cant deal. i cant write. do i have to be mizzin it to come up with some weird sad motive driven idea that changes the world and how people view their own lives. wtf?? can i be happy and write ill music? yes. but poetry. maybe i never wrote ill poetry to begin with and i have nothing to worry about. i almost sensed something witty to say as i looked in the mirror and parted my hair. nothing. so nevermind. ok wait ive narrowed it down. let me see. i can either be happy and only write ok music and suck at poetry or i can be miz and write the best music thats ever come out my ass and still suck at poetry. looks like another lonely year for me.

told you not not to bother.

frisbee

jadeismusic — Sun, 01 Mar 2009 07:51:27 +0000

red dress. red toy.

white smile. black boy.

too late? i say

stand here. just wait.

no lie. i wish

i hope. i play.

no rules? none here.

just words i say.

reprieve is near.

not yet. not here.

can do? i wont

stand here alone.

in memory

jadeismusic — Fri, 30 Jan 2009 00:55:01 +0000

as i revolve around every aspect of what we ever were

every moment i surrendered and every moment i let go

every awkward conversation a thousand first date topics that make me grin to this day

in everything that you are i believe the best in you

tainted by your selfish desire to own two

i no longer identify with who you are but what i hope you are

therefore dont coy me with your words of regret

thirsty i cannot quench your thirst

you are lost and i will miss you

you are gone and i will pray for you

if you need i will be there promise is a promise but because you are dishonest

with even yourself there are some things i cannot change

you must lay those cares upon someone else

and take care of yourself

are you really staying here?

jadeismusic — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 05:55:09 +0000

You dont belong to me. Baby, me too. I dont belong to you.

blind

jadeismusic — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 04:56:46 +0000

i started drinking around 8 830. its now 1133 and my solo dolo shindig has moved itself to sunnyside. i cant even look purity in the face. he knows me and i find it unfair and offensive. im uncomfortable and promptly wish to leave the chair which sits directly under the dimmed lightbulb as if placed for interrogation. if not for my shamelessness i would be overwhelmed by guilt at the fact that im so self aware and disconnected having no strategy on solving this immoveable weight that clouds over my chest. too much of my past has swept over me like a 24 hour virus and im crippled until it has passed on its own. by 12 30 i will have broken down and crumbled. by 12 30 tomorrow i will have thanked the lord for the given day and god willing blessed others until my next blackout.

the new goal.

jadeismusic — Thu, 25 Dec 2008 21:14:50 +0000

overturned and stomach churned the new motive is no longer

to accessorize or even fantasize about what i can grab with both hands.

it isnt to stuff my face with desireables i am no longer able to deal with myself

if i have to quench my thirst which is insatiable i have written on my agenda

posted it on my wall so i can remember. ive set an alarm on my phone

i have put it in my daily prayers. im open to change i swear it. first, i have to

clean my room.

intimate

jadeismusic — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 21:58:02 +0000

close is too close for the self aware and selfish.

such as myself, unattainable and self centered im off target with my own motives.

and my motions move faster than the dickens.

i hoard my thoughts and my words are coarse.

i know this.

ivory palace

jadeismusic — Sat, 13 Dec 2008 10:00:58 +0000

slogans can sell till you walk in and smell the place. you wouldnt catch me dead walking into burger king ordering a whopper. no. in fact, you can bet your 401k that i wont be sleeping with the enemy anytime soon. my heart belongs to the crave mostly because its the only 24 hour spot and has tarter sauce in nifty little white packages. micky can get it too, but whenever i get committed, he locks me down and i gain an extra ten. dbag.